Different Kinds of Single Ladies

   I may not know what is going on in the life of every woman, however, I have come across a few and have discovered four kinds of single ladies:

1.     SID (Single, Independent and Sophisticated)

These set of ladies are those that fit into the character of ‘MaryJane’ in the series ‘Being MaryJane’ and the lawyer in ‘Daddy’s Little Girls’. They are educated, single and sophisticated. Sometimes they either work in a big organization or they are just some rich kid. However, they find it difficult to hold down a man.

Two things are involved, either the men are already married and just want to have their way with them or they are single but have no plans of committing to them. Rather, they want to bite and bite and cut of their own chunk of the available cake. They prey on these kind of women until they are tired or they get caught in the charade. Except God intervenes, these ladies find it very difficult to find not just any man, but the ‘real’ men.

2.     Single Broke Ass (Aristos)

if you've watched 'Motives', then you'll know her

These set of women are broke. By broke I mean, jobless and with no intention of getting a job. Nevertheless, they live above this standard. They may or may not be graduates. How to they maintain their status then? Well, isn’t it obvious? Men...or women, in the case of lesbians; sugar grandfathers and mothers. They’ve built their lives around business tycoons, politicians, other peoples’ spouses, etc. Their lifestyle is so stereotyped such that they don’t even have the initiative to start a business, you know, own something. They not willing, ready or able to commit to a decent relationship. To these ladies, 'if maga don’t pay, they don’t chop.'

3.     Single, Hustling and Content

These set of ladies are hustlers. They work hard to earn their living. Unlike the SIDs, they are not so independent. This is usually because every now then they still depend on family and friends to support them in one way or the other. She has a job, but the pay check isn’t enough to foot all the bills. Nonetheless, these category of women are usually contented with what they have. They cut short their wants so as to meet up with the needs.

 

They are not willing to run into debts just to wear the most recent designer piece. When it comes to dating, these ones are usually wife materials. They also seek for true love, wish for a man who sees the best in them. Who wants to be with them, not because of their money or body but because of who they are.

4.     The In-Betweens

     This set of ladies are in between the broke asses and the hustlers. They are not as dumb as the broke asses. This set are interested in making money, to work, to own a business, etc. hence, they, like the hustlers have a good job or business but lack one thing, ‘contentment’. They want more and are not willing to wait to get it. They are ready to make it whether by hook or by crook. They can do anything to make money, from sleeping their way to the top-the boss or anybody in a position to afford them extra cash.

if you haven't watched revenge, you have to..

     They can go as far getting involved in life threatening ventures to get money. They can betray a friend/family, forsake a lover (as in boyfriend/fiancé), blackmail, etc. for money. The irony of the situation is that these kind of ladies usually have the best kind of men, but greed and selfishness either make them miss them or they just prey on their men.

What Happened to The Days When Virginity Was Valued?

Posted on July 20, 2014 by KeishaBen

   As we all know, virginity is a state where one has never had sex. Like my fellow blogger feministatsea mentioned, those who masturbate and engage in one sexual act or the other,but without a penetration of the penis into the virgina, well, can’t necessarily be called virgins (but that’s her opinion). The world has come to a point where virgins even hide their identity…I’m not saying they should go about shouting it at the roof tops, but i’m saying why do they hide it? Let me guess, some are ashamed, some feel unsafe(some people like to rape or set up virgins to be disvirgined either by force or voluntarily , etc.

I believe in virginity! I believe in the preservation of your body until the set time…of course when you are married (I know you are probably wondering if I am a virgin, but this isn’t about me).

We live in a world. Where sexual acts and intercourse has been blown out of proportion by the media. Sexual propaganda has become a marketing strategy for movies and music videos. Sex has been made to look like its food that you NEED to eat to survive…in this case…to sell your product. I remember growing up, when we watch music videos, my elder sister always complains about the fact that there is no relationship between the song and the naked girls in the videos and you know what? She was right!
Now, let’s put aside the contribution of the media in promoting sex, what about religion? There are so many religions in the world that appreciate the chastity of a woman. While so many think the concept of virginity is meant for holding down a woman or to show the superiority of men, I think for a woman to be a virgin;

1) is great
2) is safe
3) preserves your self-esteem (i.e if you understand why)

I am a christian so I’ll stick with that.

In the bible, of all the women in Jerusalem, why did God chose a virgin to be the mother of Jesus Christ? Why didn’t He use the most beautiful girl or choose a maid from the most influential family? This alone goes to show that God values chastity! Call me archaic/ancient/traditional…anything u can think of, I'll stand by my words! Furthermore, Hebrews 13:4 says, “marriage is honourable in and the bed undefiled…” I believe that in that scripture, the bed undefiled refers to both before and after marriage (no adultery). Hence, I find it hard to comprehend why some men don’t want to marry virgins and vice versa. If you think he/she is inexperienced, you can teach him/her. Sex  is an art, it can be learned.

I believe virginity is great because, virgins don’t have to bother about unwanted pregnancy and STDs, its easier for them to walk out of an abusive relationship, in some cases, they earn the respect of their spouse.

If you are out there, and you are a virgin, don’t give it away because of peer-pressure. Giving it away as a way to find comfort in pleasure due to some challenges in life isn’t gonna fetch much either, because the gifts that man gives are always temporary. Don’t do something you’ll regret. 
Sex doesn’t save a relationship! Mark these words! If it does today, it won’t tomorrow. If a man says he’s gonna love you more or better if you sleep with him, he is a liar!
All the heartbreaks and divorce cases, check it, isn’t (always) because of lack of sex. In fact, in the absence of sex, its easier for couples to deal with a failed relationship.
So, to all the ladies and gentlemen, who have chosen to remain virgins or celibate, I say, keep the flag flying, keep doing what you’re doing, keep upholding what is right! Because, like a friend of mine said, “no matter how  good or popular Bad (i’ll say wrong) is, Good(right) lurks around and will be here till Jesus comes.”
Cheers!

Skin toning, Bleaching, Skin lightening...What's the difference?

   So I was wondering, what is the difference between bleaching and skin toning?

 This is because I don't get the difference. I ask this in respect to our African women, and some men-home and abroad alike. I understand the fact that in Africa, our weather is quite hot and the sun can increase the building of melanin on our skin which increases our tendency to be darker than our western counterparts. I also understand the need to look beautiful and acceptable. However, I can't stop to wonder, do I have to look like you or change myself to be beautiful?

As a woman, its important to take care of your skin (blemish free), smell great, have your makeup on, dress great, adorn yourself with the best hairstyle, etc but not in a manner that dehumanizes you. Some people bleach/tone to the point that people who knew them before can hardly recognize them.

Let's assume that at some point in your life, things were rough and you couldn't afford an exorbitant lifestyle, but then, things turned around and you made it...in my opinion....I don't believe that your new status will change you dramatically from being chocolate in complexion to being very fair or from being Afro-American to becoming white.

Some call it modernisation, some say its trendy, some think its a necessity, but I say, as much as you try to look good, be content with such things as ye have!

Changing your colour, the makeup we adorn ourselves with, etc they don't buy love, they don't give peace of mind, instead most times, you run into debts in cash and in kind or you run into health risks.

Skin cancer and other diseases can arise from all these things that we apply on our skin. Most people who produce these products won't say or tell the risks of using them, while the marketers most times aren't aware of the contents of these products and the health risks their customers run into by using these products.

Nothing is wrong with being light skinned, but if you don't have it, don't bleach.

Hence, I propose we embrace who we are and find ways to be better without endangering our lives, trying to be someone else or propagating a wrong image of the Black Race.

Below are some black role models.